10 A refrain for living
There seem to be so many opportunities to choose
a more attractive way. When the path gets narrow, the call becomes
faint. At first the voice seemed to sound an answering echo in my
heart of hearts. It was not just what I should do, it was what I
wanted to do. Now I am having second thoughts and fear is threatening
to take hold of me.
"What shall I say:
Father save me from this hour?
But it is for this very reason that I have
come to this hour.
Father, glorify your name." (Jn
12:28)
I first felt this way when I was preparing for
ordination. So I adopted Jesus' prayer: "Father, glorify your
name". I put it on my ordination card. More importantly it
became for me a refrain for living; a refrain sometimes spoken
confidently, often in fear and trembling.
In every human life, dangers have to be faced,
risks have to be taken. So I find myself saying "Father, save me
from this hour". And often it takes all my energy to add
"Father, glorify your name".